I’m Scared!

Wow – it was another big day in crazy town. Britney had a chance to maybe get some visitation rights back today but as usual she couldn’t get her shit together. When she arrived at the courthouse several hours after the hearing started she got out & said, “I’m scared!” Then she jumped in her SUV & went to lunch! She must be really distraught!

I’m sure she was scared alright – scared she would get some visitation restored & she wouldn’t be free to drink & drug & sex her new pap bf! What a skank. They did not restore her visitation obviously & there will be another hearing in February. Waste of taxpayers money but hey it’s California & that’s how they roll for celebrities. That shit wouldn’t godown in NYC!

You have to be a real nut job not to get visitation of any kind, especially if you’re the mother!

Kaplan was very tactful in saying that this was “not a victory” because it’s such a sad tragic story. It sucks that those kids don’t have their mother around but they will surely be grateful when they are old enough to understand.

Peta needs to get the dogs taken away – seriously

I Did It All For The…………….

God I can’t wait till this douche pap comes out with the inside story of the crazy that is Britney Spears. The longer he stays in there the more money he’ll make & he deserves it!  He’s gotta kiss that mouth filled with chewed up nail & nail polish mixed with a little frapp, cheetos & marlboro lights. He probably doesn’t have to do the deed though because she’s way to high to be that coordinated! Zexxxy!

Dr. Phil Is A Douche

 

I don’t like Oprah, I never have. I know 90% of the world thinks she’s black Jesus but I think she’s phony & condescending. Someday people will see it the same as me – trust. This has nothing to do with this post but I thought I’d just throw it out there for the hell of it. Besides, she pushed Dr. Phil & Rachael Ray on the country & that’s reason enough to hate her forever. If I ever get a chance to meet Rachael Ray I am going to give her the recipe for a knuckle sandwich!

Anyway, Dr. Phil tried his best to whore out the Spears family for ratings to help BritBrit but he failed & won’t shut up about it. His pie hole had this to say –

What does he think is the answer to Britney’s troubles? “She needs to be in treatment, she needs to be in in-patient care for a period of time. Is she having a rough time right now? Yes she is. Why? I’m not really going to go into that at this point but I can tell you this is a good person and I truly believe she’ll get back to being a good person.” Dr. Phil’s message to Britney: “You can make this okay. Your family loves you. You may not always agree with what they say, with what they do but they’ve loved you when you weren’t lovable. Turn to the people that love you and listen. You have two children and you are the one in this world to protect them. There is no sacrifice that Lynne won’t make for you and there is no sacrifice that your father won’t make. They are the people that want nothing from you, and everything for you.”

He needs to shut it already. Her family loves her but nobody else gives a shit anymore. Some people can’t be & don’t want to be helped. If he really wants to help he should concentrate on Jamie Lynn because she kinda sorta maybe has a chance to keep her shit together.

Yeah, I take that back.

Thank You Jesus!

This is too good to be true! For three nights in a row Paris & the K-Fed have been photographed together. Rumor is she went to his room for a couple hours!

Dear Jesus – Please keep these two kids together. It’s a new year & I deserve it. Britney is totally gonna beat her ass with an umbrella, but at the end of the day, Paris will be a way better mother to the kids! You know, cuz’ she loves animals & shit!

Thank you Jesus!

Whatever!

Britney was asked by the paps last night what she thought about Jamie Lynn’s pregnancy & she said, ” I taught her everything I know & she’ll be a bigger piece of trash than I am!”

Noooooo she said, “My sisters’ not pregnant. Whatever!”

OK! is saying that this was revealed to the family at Thanksgiving, so either Britney was too high to remember being told or nobody told her.

In other breaking news, Lynne Spear’s Book On Parenting has been put on hold. -LOL! The idea was pretty funny before JL got sperminated, now it’s pure comedy gold! I hope they do publish it, I’ll be the first one in line!

Unfitmie! Jamie Lynn Is Knocked Up!

The Spears family continues to be the gift that keeps on giving! Just in time for Christmas Lynn & Unfitmie Jamie Lynn dished to OK! magazine about the pregnancy . The 16 year old says the father is Casey Aldridge whom she met at church! Class!

Can you blame her? She needed some attention! It’s so hard to live in the shadow of the biggest white trash skank in the country! She’s keeping it for now. But I’m sure if she asked nicely, K-Fed would take it off her hands for a nominal fee when she gets bored of mothering like her sister did.

What will Nickelodeon think?

SOURCE

Banned

 

Four Seasons finally took my advice & banned her ass from the premises! Class!

See it here

Britney Should Be Embarrassed – Again

Britney paid some chics to dress up as two dollar hookers to portray her in her new video of “Piece Of Shit Me” which was very true to life. A couple of them haven’t showered for a couple of months & have frapp stained teeth so it’ll totally going to be nominated for some bogus award. This shit would never happen if Ronnie Reagan were alive. I blame Madonna & Clinton.

She claims to be “Miss American Dream” & if this is true we need to file a class action lawsuit against the government for Breach Of Contract!

K-Fed should be compensated & given 2/3 of her assets! One third for him, one for JJ & one for SP. What? Don’t be ignorant, she made more money off the publicity from marrying him then he’ll ever get from her & he is raising the kids! The kids of corrupted spawn that had Madonna tongue in it – ewwwww!Anyway here’s poorly edited version of the video that you won’t be able to get enough of

BS Should Be The New Face Of Pro Active

This is the bazillionth picture I have seen of Britney Spears with meth face acne. When is Pro Active gonna call her already!?

This is her pulling into the Four Seasons AGAIN last night. Drug dealers don’t deliver to Malibu mansions? Go home! And by home we mean Louisianna or Guatamala!

Heidi Klum Is A Plumber

I used to think Heidi Klum was class until about a month ago when she started giving interviews. She’s not very sophisticated & the dumb sucks the hot outta people fast!

This is what she wore to the VS show a few nights ago. All she needs is a tramp stamp & a bag of Cheetos & she’ll be on Britney’s level of trash. Shouldn’t you wear a bra & panties to rep VS?

Cheeto Is Gonna Kill Somebody!

There should be laws against texting & driving. This is the second video this week where I’ve seen Cheeto w/ a Blackberry in her face & not watching where the hell she is going!

Who the hell is she texting anyway? What is she like 12? Call them & say what you have to say & pay attention to the frickin’ road!!!!

Oh, she runs over another paps foot in this vid too. They need to wear steel toed boots around her!

Billy Ray Cyrus Has Lost His Mind!

Billy Ray wants to invite Cheeto to his house for Thanksgiving. Good idea! Put Miley on the fast track to skankville, it’s taking too long!

Britney Spears may not be sharing a feast with her family this Thanksgiving, but Billy Ray Cyrus is offering his home as an alternative. He asks In Touch to send this message to Britney: “Honey you are welcome to a Nashville Thanksgiving at our house,” Billy tells In Touch. “We love her. We would love to be there for you and we care about you.” Even his pop star daughter, Miley Cyrus, who stars as Hannah Montana on Disney’s hit show, wants troubled Britney to share their special day. “Miley is a big fan and she wants to reach out, too. We want her to know that’s it’s never too late to make things right.”

Gimme More Danced Properly

This is a video of the rehearsal of Cheeto’s Gimme More VMA performance. It looks pretty cool because she’s not there.

Anyway, some tools on the internets (probably Ali) say that it was awful choreography & not worthy of Cheeto & that’s probably why she didn’t put much effort into it.

Now we know this is all bullshit. They tried to give her the easiest routine possible because she was a high blobby mess, but she still couldn’t do it!

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Live From Las Vegas!

 

ONTD posted this gem of Britney spewing diarrhea, I mean, “singing” live in Las Vegas back in 2001. It’s a hoot! No seriously, I think she hooted a couple times!

God bless America, it’s the only place in the world that rewards people with zillions of dollars for contributing nothing to society! Listen to the crazy here.

Jessica Wants To Sell You Sh*t

Jessica Simpson launched her clothing line at Macy’s this weekend in NYC.  That is some hideous shit. But now at least we know where Britney has been getting her two dollar ghetto hooker duds!